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Right now, we are recording antiphonies at the headquarters. Although we have
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just published the second antiphony book, we are already going on to the third book.
Seeing the antiphony books being published and their CDs being recorded, I feel that
the Lord wants us to know once again what He desires in worship.
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While reading the church weekly bulletin written by Pastor Peter this month, my
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heart was drawn to one sentence.
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Man has a reason for being only as the existence to respond to
God.Man is the existence that finds its true meaning only as the
being that responds to God's calling, "Yes, amen." That is all.
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(From the weekly bulletin of February 6, 2005)
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Man is the existence to hear the voice of God. To hear is to believe. To believe
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is to respond. It is to respond and follow Him saying, "Amen. (So be it.)" I was
convinced once again that faith is to give our unconditional response to God. We
respond to the words God speaks. We do not need our judgment. We just respond. I
think we can see God's will when we seek this world.
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I remember the words I heard around the time I met the Lord. I am not sure
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whether it happened in my dream or when I was half awake.
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After all, man's discretion is not that great.
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I was surprised at the voice and wondered about the words "after all," which
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was not in my vocabulary. More than that, I had a repulsive reaction to it, "If man's
discretion is not great, then is only God's discretion so great?" In those days, I believed
that man's discretion was the most excellent of all things and could possibly solve all
problems, because I believed there was no other existence besides man.
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Therefore, it was very natural for me to think that the center of the world was
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man. However, as I knew God, I understood that actually it was not natural to think so,
and I found that it was God who is the center of the world. I did not consciously make
any effort to think so, but the more widely my eyes were opened to God, the more I
was able to see God's desire and the harmonious world God was longing for.
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I used to believe firmly that I would not be myself without self-assertion, but the
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more I knew that I did not need my asserting self, the freer I became. Though I cannot
exist without ego, if I could be without being influenced by it, I believe I would be able to
live as I am, as my most natural self.
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I think that as I empty myself, I can live more freely. As the world becomes
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more God-centered, beautiful harmony of all creatures will be brought about, and each
creature will live in it.
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This is the world of responding to God, the world where we exist to respond to
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God. If I quote the words of Pastor Peter, it is the world of life in harmony. This is the
world which can be revealed in "worship." I believe that antiphony is the revelation of
the worship in its extremity.
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All creatures respond to what God speaks. We respond to it.
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I believe that the "extremity" of the world of life God desires is fulfilled in praise,
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in the resounding of words.
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Being spoken by God and responding to Him through praise means that, whether
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we notice it or not, we become one with the resounding of the very original life of the
scriptures. In the resounding, there is the desire of God which man can never fathom,
because the desire of God works through the resounding to fulfill itself. After all, man's
discretion is not great, but the greatness of God's discretion can be revealed in the
resounding beyond man's understanding.
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I heard something similar to the antiphony at the mass of Catholic Church
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before the present style of antiphony was given to us. It was more like chanting
(monotonous repetition of a song). Although the voice of the congregation singing in
response sounded half-hearted, I remember that I was still awed. Yet the meaning of
the words did not stay in my heart.
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Also, at the Protestant church which I used to attend, they read the scriptures
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using a hymn book. I think it was from Psalms, which a pastor and the congregation
read by turns. I did not understand the difference between reading alone and alternate
reading of a pastor and the congregation, nor the point of it. Pastor Peter also was
doing the scripture reading and the congregational response right before the antiphony
was given to us. However, I did not yet understand what good it was. After we were
given the antiphony, I began to understand it. I do not think it a mere coincidence that
it was given to us after we knew the depth of praise, because the world that praise
seeks to achieve can be found in the antiphony.
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The beauty and the life of the antiphony are shown first in the faith of those
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who believe. The mass of Catholic Church and the congregational reading of the
Protestant church seemed to me a mere formality. There was not so much flow of life.
(Or rather, I had not grown up fully to feel the flow of life.) I am sure that it would be
different if there were people who believed that the antiphony reveals the extremity of
worship and that it has the power to heal and save the earth.
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The world of the antiphony is the world of the "lilies of the field."
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A lily can be nothing but a flower if you see so, but it is not just a mere flower if
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you have an eye. There are those who can hear God's voice from one lily. They would
see the life of God and touch the love of God. The lily of the field responds to God. It is
just an existence to respond. There are those who see in such a small existence the
entire universe, and even see that it manifests the world of life and reveals God. You
will see God's desire fulfilled in the world.
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Blessed are those who hear the desire of God in the antiphony ! Through the
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antiphony we will keep learning what worship is all about. I thank God from the bottom
of my heart for giving us worship and the joy of worship.
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